RTOTD #656.1

Day 656.1

I think there's an epidemic of girls that are totally NOT of legal age getting a bunch of ink done. And it's freaking me out.

I know this is a revelation, but I love girls with ink. A great body will draw my attention. A pretty face as well. But what keeps it is any body modifications they have. And ink is a pretty obvious one.

So when a group of us were at Cedar Point this weekend and I started to notice (and have pointed out to me) girls that had a bunch of ink that, upon inspection of their face, I couldn't tell if they were 15 or 23... I kinda freaked out.

Maybe I'm just getting old and can't quite distinguish anymore. Maybe I'm just getting old and 21 or 19 is starting to look no different than jailbait. And I'm automatically assuming a 5-year cushion in order to be on the safe side... but still.

We were in line for one ride and there were a number of people in front of us when my one roomie poked me and asked "how old do you think that girl is?" about the girl in the group directly in front of us.

I took a glance out of the corner of my eye at her face and said "couldn't be a day over 16"

And after a moment of hessitation she told me "look at her back when she turns around"

I waited a moment and then, when her back was to me, staring right at me, was a rather large tattoo across the top of her back.

It was at that moment that I realized I'm no longer able to effectively judge the age of any girl and I swear to fucking christ, I'm going to start demanding that girls to wear their ID's on a necklace in front of them so that I can see it clearly before uttering a single word.

I used to use ink as a pretty good determining factor when speaking to someone in that gray area. The 17-22 range where a lot of girls can look older than their age or younger. Ink was a pretty clear indicator in most cases. Sure, there were the occasional times when a parent would sign for their kid to get a tattoo under 18, but that was few and far between. Going by that rule was generally pretty safe. But now, it seems to me that this has become an epidemic. And it's freaking me the fuck out.

This again, brings up my Potato Sack Policy idea that I've had since I was 19. Girls under 18 must wear a potato sack at all times in order for us to know. Plus... a potato sack is totally unappealing on every conceivable level... Unless you have an Idaho starch fetish. Which would be weird. So with it being so ugly, and obvious... well... it mitigates the "oh shit, I'm going to jail!" factor.

Oh... but then fashion will find a way to incorporate the potato sack into fashion so 20-something and 30-something girls can dress like a teenager again. And then we're back to square fucking one.

Instead... I'm going to automatically assume that everyone that isn't obviously within 2 years of my age one way or the other is either illegal or a fossil from now on. But then again, I'm probably also being creepy by even looking at girls that are in that gray area. Cause I'm becoming an old fuck. Or maybe only pick up girls in bars. Because even if they're there on a fake ID, they're most likely at least 18 and legal.