Force - RTOTD #798

Day 798

So I didn't really do much while I was in Texas that's story-worthy. For the most part, I just kinda went into the office there, did all the stuff that I needed to, went back to my hotel and took a shower, hunted fuuds and then watched Netflix. To be honest, it was pretty boring.

However, I did hang out with an old friend/ex-girlfriend and her fiance while I was there. And I got substitute dogs to hang out with during my trip. The office in Houston has a "yard dog" that kinda plays guard dog. He's an old boy that you can tell is getting up in age (he's been there for as long as I can remember, and I was first at that yard 8 or 9 years ago) and was a stray that wandered in and never left because he kinda found a "home" in a scrap yard.

I also got to get my evening substitute puppy time with my old friend's dog. They have a year-old puppy that is full of energy. About the size of @Artemis_Fallen's dog. But taller and skinnier. Still all paws and legs like a lot of year-old puppies. But I'm not here to talk about the dogs. As much as it was fun to play with them.

Well, the one evening, we all went to dinner with their other roomies. I drove, like usual, mostly because my rental was the biggest of all the cars and it was easier to just take the 1. On the way, we ended up having a conversation about how much of an influence I have on people. Primarily with the girls that I have dated, and in 1 way in particular.

While we agreed that it was likely because I hadn't quite figured out my Bimboization kink nearly as much as I have at this point (which is still pretty far from fully examined), apparently for a long period of time I was subconsciously engaging in basically Forced Feminization. But Forced Feminization of women, which is a little more obscure of a kink than the more standard submissive male kink of being force feminized by a FemDom. For those readers out there that aren't as familiar with some of the kinky stuff that I write about (believe it or not, there are a lot of vanilla readers that send me e-mail asking questions about the kinkier stuff that I write) most of the time, Forced Feminization is something that I have seen associated with humiliation for submissive males. I, on the other hand, practiced virtually the same thing on girls. But not necessarily with an emphasis on the humiliation aspect, though I guess it was still there to a degree because it wasn't something they were entirely comfortable with, or else it wouldn't have been "forced".

I mean, I guess I was doing it. And I was being clear from the beginning that "this is how it was gonna be if you really have any interest in dating me". But I didn't really "name" it. I just kinda said "here's the things that I like" and then went from there.

But part of the conversation was also on the way that that impact stretched beyond the period of time that we were dating. The way that those changes that I demanded in wardrobe or how they did their makeup or whatever... the way that they stuck with the people I dated. The way that they liked the changes that I had made to the point of not only continuing to present themselves in a similar fashion, but in the way that they occasionally even continued down the same road that was not necessarily discussed but anyone with 2 firing neurons could figure out where the road led.

And after thinking about it and thinking about the other girls that I've dated that I demanded similar "changes" out of, and on occasions that I would run into them down the line at something, how often they had also kept those same "changes".

I just find it interesting. And to a degree, it's a validation of what I was doing. I hesitate to use the term "improve" when it comes to the long-term impact that I could possibly have on someones life, but in the few discussions that I had with people while we were dating, mostly to get their feedback and see if they were growing comfortable with those changes, or even in cases where I spoke to them after the fact, the general concensus was that they were happier with themselves after the fact than they were before. So hey, maybe I'll chalk it up to some positive reinforcement and being at the right place at the right time. And because I'm a complete narcissist, I kinda like that I ended up being "right" as well as finding out that I wasn't just being humored or placated while we were together if they chose to keep those changes after the fact.

Maybe it's just my thing? Find kinda hippy chicks or the types that don't put that much effort into their appearance (or those that are just a little shy and want to blend in rather than stand out) and then push them in a way to alter their appearance in a way that they likely would not have without prompting, and then doing so in a way that improves their self-esteem.

So I guess I'm doing a public service. I'm like a Life Coach... for whorification!

The Doktor: Helping Womens' Self-Esteem, One Bimbo-Building At A Time.

You can all thank me. Line forms to the left.

Taboo - RTOTD #782

Day 782

By and large, my kinks are fairly pedestrian when compared to some others that I've seen on here. I generally prefer a lot of the basics. Rope & floggers, punching & resistance, rough & raw sex, and a few others. I've discussed my preferences for slutty over sexy, and trashy over beautiful in the past. I won't really get into that. My bimbofication kink is something that I've talked about a little too often recently and you can always go through my writings of the past month or so and find that, if you so care to read it.

Instead, I think I'll take this opportunity to talk about some of my more taboo kinks, even if they pale in comparison to those of some that reply below. Feel free to do so and discuss your own, if you'd like. I wanted to take today to open the discussion not to just the basic daily praise of my awesomeness, but to make this an open forum to discuss some of your kinks that maybe you don't feel comfortable discussing in open forums elsewhere. Mostly because I don't delete comments or topics that I might not be comfortable with, or that someone else gets their panties in a wad about.

So I'll volunteer to go first. Because fuck you, I'm awesome and don't mind being the first one to walk around with no pants on.

Actually... I'm going to kinda go first. I say "kinda" because I don't really have anything terribly taboo in my brain that is wildly out there. So instead, I'm going to discuss a couple of my most taboo kinks, even if they're not all that super-amazingly-taboo.

First one is probably the most tame of the 3 most taboo that I have.

It's a weird thing that I have. Girls in heels. Considering that I HATE feet and think they're gross. Not the "oh that's gross, I kinda wanna do it" kinda gross. I mean like "oh fuck you and die" gross. I never understood the feet thing. I mean, if that's your thing, awesome. But I just don't get it.

However, I have a thing for girls in heels. I think this probably connects back to my bimbo/slutty kink, because of the connections with porn whores and strippers. It probably also has something to do with the impracticality of heels for anything other than aesthetic purposes. I mean, you can't tell me that anyone is going to run faster or me more sure-footed when walking on ice while wearing heels. I mean, maybe if they're really motherfucking sharp and you can stab them into things for traction. But still... when they start making high-heeled cleats for girls soccer or field hockey teams, then I'll believe that there's a practical purpose for heels other than to make a girl a little taller, and to change her posture to make her legs look longer and to put her ass and tits on better display. And well, I don't see them making golf spike heels anytime soon that aren't solely for photo shoots. When a professional women's golfer starts wearing them for the LPGA Championship and wins it, then I'll bite.

But for some reason, it's only girls in stripper heels. I KNOW that this part has to do with my subconscious mental affiliations between girls in stripper heels and my propensity to be attracted towards slutty girls. Non-stripper-y heels on girls do nothing. Yeah, sure. They change your posture and everything too... but for some reason, they don't have the same turn-on factor for me.

So I guess I kind of have a high heel kink while having a foot repulsion? I don't know. I'm weird.

The next kink I wanted to talk about was body modification.

I'm an artist at heart. I've drawn and painted and sculpted and both wrote and performed music since I was 5. I've written more here than anywhere else, and I've written one book so far, with a few more on the distant horizon (mostly when I can get the energy to once again go through the marathon that is writing a book) and have scripted and drawn at least parts or large chunks of at least 3 potentially-long-form comic series. I've put the puzzle pieces together to potentially build a shared-superhero-comics universe that has its own secret history and aliens and mystical crap and everything else that goes along with the 20th and 21st century superhero comics. And that's excluding the half-dozen plotted non-superhero comics that I've come up with as well. I see the art in most things and the aesthetics that make things appealing. From cars to comics, ink to interior design, painting to piercing, and stereos to sculpture. There's a beauty in design that nearly rivals function.

Form and function are always curiously placed as opposing forces when I often see them as serving each other quite well. You want something to server a purpose; a function. But the thing is, you also have to often LOOK at the thing that is doing that job. And therefore, it should be something that you want to look at too. Something unique and cool and pretty and original.

I've written along these lines before in Body Mod forums and I'll rehash it here. Body Mod is really no different than any sort of other customization that we do.

We're born with our bodies and generally, with a few small details, they're pretty much the same. You certainly have size differences, skin tone differences, hair color differences, and all the rest. But really, almost all human bodies are generally pretty similar to one another. And you can look at it as a Phenomenal vs Noumenal Kant-like philosophical question. The concept of a chair is always the same even if this chair and that chair look different from each other. But you can also compare the human body to automobiles. And that's the way that I like to look at it.

The comparison is quite apt. We both are run on an engine that needs fueled and while we come in different colors and sizes and shapes, we're all pretty much the same. Some of us are blessed with better skin or hair, some cars are built with better upholstery or  quality paint for durability. Some of us are more athletic or smarter, in the same ways that different cars might be better designed to drive a street race track or filled with all the tech that makes driving more comfortable. Whatever those differences, they're represented in the automobile analogy.

But see... body mod is actually in the exact same spirit as automobile enthusiasts around the world. We're all about customizing. Yeah, the factory specs on the car might be fucking great. But that doesn't mean we can't make it ours and unique from any of the 25,000 other virtually identical cars in that production run. We might have bought the unique color or the super-deluxe packages, but so did a thousand other people. No, what we want is to make it one-of-a-kind. And that's when you get into the custom car people. That's who us BodyMod people are. We're the custom car enthusiasts of the human body. We want to design and build and mix and match from both totally original concepts and after-market production parts. We won't be the first person to roll the fenders to accommodate the 3" drop and 8" wide wheels and tires and we won't be the person to do a set of nipple rings either. We won't be the first person to airbrush a whole piece that stretches from half way down the driver's door to the rear fender and wraps around to match the symmetrical design on the other side before meeting for a whole new merger of designs that covers the whole trunk of the car and we won't be the first person to do a set of sleeves that meet at the shoulders and merge into a huge back piece.

We won't be the first to do any of that. But what we will be is the one that designs how all of the individual pieces go into it and where they fit and how they fit. We'll pick the colors for the paint or ink. The types of metals for the trim or piercings. The body kits or surgical procedures to change all the lines or how they body shape works.

And we do it all with an eye towards a final finished product that is totally unique and original, personal and deliberate, that emphasizes the parts most beautiful parts and washes away the flaws or inadequacies that you see in the original factory-issue design.

The best thing about heavy BodyMod is that sometimes you're the owner, sometimes you're the car, and sometimes you're a Transformer and can be both. And there's you random 80's nostalgia reference thrown in for a joke.

The final taboo kink that I really enjoy and wanted to mention here is watersports.

To some, it's as normal as kissing, and to others, it's equated with scat play. There's no line for some people and they can't see that one. One can't engage in one while still being disgusted by the other, in the eyes of some. It's edgy. And taboo.

Honestly, this is probably the only kink I have on my list that I would legitimately call "taboo" just because there are so many that reject it outright. It's terribly niche and it conjures up bile in many. In the same way that eating a chocolate bar while sitting on the toilet does for well... anyone that isn't into that kinda brown thing in your mouth stuff. And I figure, if it makes some people sick to their stomach to even think about, then it's probably fairly taboo.

I mean, I know that furries make me feel a little nauseous. Mascot fucking.

But to me, it's a turn on because it's a form of edge play that really only have a very very dull edge. The psychological edge is far sharper than the physical side. And I think maybe that's the side of it that I really get turned on by. The unconscious concept of ingesting any form of waste is the edge here. Even if it's not really waste as much as excess. Unless you're actually ill. Then all of this is thrown out the window and it's just not healthy at all and right into the same physical edge play as it is psychological.

I'm not sure what else I can really say about it though. It's an edge play that isn't an edge play because it lacks the fundamental physical risk that is really required to be categorized as actual edge play, while still striking the same psychological triggers that edge play normally does. So it's kind of a best-of-both-worlds situation where I can still get the emotional and psychological reaction that I'm looking to achieve out of a partner, while not really risking their physical well-being in the process.

So there you go... there's a few thousand words on taboo kinks. And I really hope that other people will chime in on some of their taboo kinks and what it is about them that they enjoy or even as just use today's column as an excuse to admit out-loud (or as loud as your interwubz box key-strokes are) as to some of their taboo kinks.

I kinda wish mine weren't so pedestrial and boring, to be honest.

Unconventional Kinks - RTOTD #773

Day 773

So I've been thinking about this a little recently and wanted to maybe throw some of those thoughts down onto the intertron about them. So here's a series of disjointed thoughts just thrown at the keyboard this morning with no real attempt to make them into a coherent post.

1. I think we've all figured out that I have a thing for slutty/skanky/trampy/trashy/bimbo-ish girls at this point. And I've kinda come to realize that a lot of my old kinks are fading a bit in the past year or 2 while this particular kink has grown stronger and stronger. To the point where it's almost reached fetish level for me.

2. Continuing on this, with other kinks becoming of lesser and lesser interest while this one grows, is this a sign that I have a finite amount of kinkiness and as one kink grows stronger, another must fade to accomodate it? Would that even make any sense? It might, but it also might not. I haven't put that much thought into it yet.

3. Where does that leave me with some of my other kinks? They don't seem as important to engage in anymore. I mean, I want to, but I just don't have that same motivation. Is it because I am so "out of practice" with playing with rope or throwing a flogger or even keeping my rhythm with drumsticks, that I don't know if I want to re-hone those skills? Is that a thing? Do I want to experience some of the learning curve that I had many years ago when I first started playing around with rope and impact?

4. I don't really play much, and I don't really go out of my way to find people to play with. My intensity level is lower when it comes to this. Do I need to just say "fuck it" and play around with some of my more conventional kinks and see if that same animalistic and sadistic side grows stronger again?

Not everything that once fit somewhere
will always fit in the same place

5. What would that do to my bimbo-fetish if I do, in fact, have a finite quantity of kinkiness to spread around to my different interests?

6. Where do I really fit in around here if this is my most powerful kink and the others are kinda reaching the "meh" stage? It's not a conventional kink. In fact, it seems to be a pretty niche kink. When everyone else is playing with rope or beating the hell out of someone, I'm standing and staring and trying to work on an art project of designing the most asthetically appealing look on a girl and helping to bring out a side of her that is often downright whorish. That's not exactly the most conventional kink or the most easy to play with in a scene. It's not something where I can go "ok, and this begins the scene and this other thing here ends it and here's what we're going to do in between"... this is a kinda endless scene with one person. It doesn't really have a set beginning, middle, or end like a play session. There's not really any way TO play in the conventional "let's have a scene at this party/dungeon/home tonight" sense.

7. How many of my other kinks fit this same unconventional category? How many are uncategorizable? How many are niche? How many other people are in the same boat?

8. Finally... where is the happy medium between my bimbo fetish and my more conventional kinks? Because I think I'm losing it if I ever had a grip on where it was.

So yeah... there's a bunch of words about this. Maybe at some point, I'll actually write something up that makes more sense, but not right now. I just wanted to throw this down and maybe some of the comments will spur some other thoughts that tie this shit together. Because as of right now, these are all terribly fragmented and there's a lot of rambling nonsense involved. A mix of practical and metaphysical bullshit that is a little hard to tie together.

Ok... I'm done with this for now.