Random Thought Of The Day #674

Day 674

Here's a bunch of quick thoughts:

1. With how fucked up and poorly researched a lot of online articles from "legitimate" news sources are anymore, I'm wondering... How long until my blog accidentally gets cited by someone because they didn't do their research? And then... how fucking hilarious would that be?

And that's the end of my flights of fantasy for the day.

2. Wait... so the female Keanu Reeves... that chick from the glampire movies and the shitty snow white movie... she was actually dating the sparkly piece of lumber that is still trying to convince... well... everyone... that he's an actor and not just a bad haircut covered in glitter that shimmers in the sunlight?

♫♪♫♫♪ He's so dreammmyyyy ♫♪♫♫♪...

Wait what? I didn't say anything!

First of all... I guess that makes sense on a lot of levels. Neither of their careers are going to last much beyond those shitty movies and their acting range is about the same. With as vast of a range as "dour" to "more dour", both of which mixed with a little bit of "confused at their surroundings while moderately shocked but kinda meh about pretty much everything going on in the world around them" on a face that just screams "I really need some more sleep".

I still think they totally could have made a better series of movies with a group of hand puppets or marionettes. Come on... shitty glampire marionettes? How fucking great would that have been? Paint one of the back-up marionettes in glitter paint and boom... makeup is done. Just do a quick cut to her expressionless face (you could use a close-up of the wood or of her face. result will be about the same.) and watch the entire absence of any emotion when he gets hit by sunlight for the first time. It would have been tearless-jerking to no end. So many no-feels.

And now I don't care about that either anymore. I just wanted an excuse to remind you all of how shitty Twilight and sparkle not-vampires are. And how fans of those movies should kill themselves because of how poor their taste is. You have no taste at all. I bet you also liked Ben Affleck movies where he wasn't being directed by Kevin Smith (or in Dazed & Confused. Cause that's just got pretty much everyone in it). Because you're soulless cinematic masochists.

3. Also... has anyone else noticed that the one other guy that's in there... I don't know what the fuck role he plays. The real tan dude? He's tried to be an "action star" kinda but he's like 12 and Bruce Willis would beat him half to death if they ended up in an action movie together.. Does anyone else think that guy looks like a tan version of Tyler Kennedy? And kind of like a fruit-bat?

For anyone who doesn't know what I'm talking about... he's a winger for the Penguins. And he looks like a fruit-bat.

I'll be so happy when these movies disappear forever back into their obscurity.

4. So hotels are now offering conceirge service for the teenagers that come on family vacations.

Yes, because what we needed to do was somehow give more validation to the self-absorbed, spoiled children of the  instant-gratification generation to their notion that they actually matter. To the point of the hotels pretending that they actually are important enough to be catered to. Because the hotels believe that these kids have "purchasing power". No... they don't. Because they don't have an income. You have to have income to have purchasing power. And a way-too-fucking-high allowance from mommy and daddy isn't an income.

5. I think I had a dream about one of my friends reading a series of books that I'm in the process of re-reading. I remember seeing the book in their hand, but I don't even remember what the gender of the person holding it was. And I remember saying "oh, I enjoyed those books. Are you reading the whole series?" and then conversing about it for a bit. It was strange though. Because it felt like I actually had that conversation.

Did I? Have I told someone recently "oh yeah, I read that and I'm in the process of re-reading it right now." recently? I can't actually can't tell if this was a dream or if this actually happened. Normally, I can always tell... this one? Nope.