Is there a party this weekend? Cause I damn well don't remember planning one. And I don't pay attention to what anyone else does. And it says, quite plainly, on the event notice... "October 27th". Which, for calendar impaired, is not this weekend. Today is the 19th. Tomorrow is the 20th. To help you with the math, that means 8 days from now. It does not take 8 days to reach tomorrow. I know this may be complicated to some, but the calendar is your friend. If you can't figure out how it works, you really shouldn't be using a computer and you should try starting with Kindergarten again and working your way up through school from start to finish again.
Additionally, I have no idea who almost a dozen people on the RSVP list are. I was looking through it and was terribly confused by this.
Who RSVP's for a party where they don't even know the host? Do people not read event listings or something? For the majority of the past year, I've written event listings with a pretty clear disclaimer about this.
We do not host "community events". We host private parties. I post them publicly because Fet doesn't allow for mass-messaging. I don't want to put together a mailing list or anything because that kinda shit, even in the age of smart phones with calendar listings built in that allow for easily adding an event to your calendar, people forget about them. I also don't do a mailing list because I don't want to forget to add people to it as I get to know new people that I don't hate. I don't want to turn "managing an event invitation mailing list" into a fucking job. I refuse to have to double-check it every month and think "did I forget to add some new person to the list?" and then find out I forgot to add like 3 people.
But really... every party for the past 6 months or longer, I've gotten messages from total stranger that knows nobody and has never been do anything asking me "hey, where is this place? Wait... what? I clearly state that it's at my house and that if I don't know you or like you, or you're not the guest of someone that I do know and trust, I'm not letting you in the fucking door. How hard is that to grasp for people?
I saw someone else write about this in the past few weeks, so I don't really feel all that compelled to re-hash the same subject again. You might have already read that writing by some other person and I'm not here to re-tread territory that someone else has already covered. I am here to just point this out. And to make this perfectly clear to the people that might know who I am because you read my stuff, but I have no idea who you are (which happens to be a good number of people)... I am not just going to hand out my home address to any cocksmack with an internet connection just because they want to come to a party. And I would greatly appreciate everyone that is a reader not giving it to anyone that they don't know just because they're RSVP'd to the party.
I will no longer hesitate to turn away people that I don't know when they get to the door. If someone messages you and says "hey, where is this place?", point them to me. I figure this is probably not something that I need to explain and it's kind of common sense. I wouldn't just give out your address to some random person that messages me if you're throwing a party. I don't think this is an issue that has crept up, but I just figured I'd just get a pre-emptive strike on it by mentioning it. Who really does that though? Who thinks that's reasonable behavior? Who thinks "hey, this is a party at a private residence and I don't know the person that lives there. It should be totally OK for me to go, right?" I know it's a thing posted publicly, but there's also a disclaimer about just this situation right in the middle of the event description. If you don't read it, fuck you. That's a whole lotta not my fucking problem.
Is this an entitlement thing? People think that they can't be discriminated against for any reason because it's the kink community? I'm god damn discriminating. I'm picky as fuck as to who I will let in my god damned house. Remember, there's a difference in discriminating and prejudging. People think that because it's the kinky world, the rules of the vanilla world don't apply on who can go where? They're kinky, so of course the most basic social norms go right out the fucking window?
I've said this before and I'll say it again. There's only very minor differences between the kinky world and the vanilla one. Most of the basic social norms still apply. While some things that would not be appropriate in the vanilla world are both acceptable and sometimes encouraged in the kinky one, the REALLY basic ones don't change. The common decency and common sense rules are still right the fuck there.
I'm just going to fall back on the "there's a lot of people that excuse their own personal brand of crazy as 'just kinky' and think that makes it all ok" theory I've had for a while now. Oh no, I know what it is... it's a combination of 2 things. They have a kink for party crashing at the homes of strangers AND subscribe to the "my kink is always OK" extension of the "your kink might not be my kink but it's ok" theory. That's really the only explanation if they aren't either fucking retarded or batshit crazy.
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