Day 887
So apparently there's been some kind of recent upswing in celebrities with weird delusions on conspiracy theories. I keep coming across them every so often. One of the sisters of that broad with the enormous ass that's married to Kanye who are all famous for wholly perplexing reasons who was yammering on about Chemtrails. All of the (rather startling number of) celebrities that are 9/11 Truthers. Crack & AIDS were created by the CIA to kill black people & the gays. The baffling number of people that believe the moon landing was a fake.
But the most recent revival of a centuries old conspiracy theory is the flat earth one that is apparently going on on Twitter right now promoted by a rapper & argued against by Neil DeGrasse fucking Tyson.
Now see, this is a conspiracy theory that I just don't get because I don't even understand its purpose. I mean, ok... The rest at least pass the sniff test. Not necessarily in legitimacy but on the "could it even be a conspiracy?" level. Why? Because what's the purpose of a conspiracy to begin with? You create a conspiracy to hide some nefarious goals that generally revolve around the acquisition or continued stranglehold on power, control, general authority or wealth, right? Let's even look at some of them assuming that they're not bat guano insane:
Crack & AIDS being created to kill black people to prevent a loss of power built around systemic racism. Kill them if you can't control them or some other generally similar racist reasons.
The faked moon landing could have been done to hide the billions of dollars that the aerospace industry & space program spent & how many people got rich for accomplishing nothing. Taxpayers would lose their shit. It was a Cold War propaganda tool but all the people involved got filthy rich & the country was lied to.
Chemtrails? I guess some sort of mass control or dosing of the public with some sort of chemical for indeterminate reasons. Nanobots to take over our brains at some point down the line. I don't fucking know. Something something controlling people & maintaining authority probably.
9/11 was an inside job? Don't even get me started on all the insane conclusion jumping in this one. Surprised nobody has gotten a muscle tear from all that leaping.
Fuck, I love a cool conspiracy theory as much as anyone else (it's Bearenstein Bears, not Bearenstain & I know that I accidentally fell into a parallel universe) but come the fuck on here. What in the ever loving blue fuck is the purpose behind a flat earth conspiracy? I have so many fucking questions about why anyone would give 2 tugs of a dead dog's cock about the shape of the planet & why flat, round, square or imaginary, why it would matter.
Why would people spend centuries denying it? Does flatness give people who know of it godly powers? Do you learn to see the 3rd dimension as the hologram that it is?
What is at "the edge"? Big piles of gold? Leprechauns? Unicorns? A really odd view? Narnia? A really cool rock. Where we put all the dinosaur bones?
Are there guards and stuff that protect "the edge"? Just like lines of troops? Or robots? Monkeys with pitchforks? A big wall? Did Donald Trump build it? Is he actually a really adept wall builder?
Does it like wrap around back underneath? Like you immediately get to the edge & it's like a conveyor belt that wraps you around underneath or like you get to the edge of a mirror & just start going in the other direction but realize you're now IN the mirror?? If so, I think Kiefer Sutherland owes these guys some royalty money. So how can it wrap around & yet we still have oceans & shit that we can dive down into. If we dive all the way to the bottom of the Marianas Trench, do we come out in Mirror Earth on the other side or something?
Who benefits & how from this bewildering theory & insult to physics? Not like anyone makes any money out of the deal. And unless it's some weird Mirror World invasion plot or something, it doesn't really do much for control or power or authority except for some weird arbitrary control of information exercise. So seriously... Why would there even need to BE a conspiracy about a Flat Earth. Not like anyone's exactly getting rich off that sweet sweet gentle curve of the globe or anything.
This is just one that makes my fucking head hurt. And that's saying something. I think about paradoxes of time travel for fun.
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